risa story

saw your face.. and listen with "my eyes" all your worries.. you are so open and vulnerable and our fears for days and nights we could not be together.. love makes us like this.. nothing we can do.. and i love you even more..

certain simple things.. and these could sweep my feet off the ground.. call me silly in love.. or you may call me..a honest one. Listen: this world is the lunatic's sphere, Don't always agree it's real, Even with my feet upon it And the postman knowing my door My address is somewhere else. ― حافظ , The Gift  

listen with my eyes.. because life is amazingly complicated and simple at the same time..

you said i am different.. i do journeys, lots of travelings.. with thousands.. listen patiently for many discussions.. observe diligently the fears and emotions.. smile with them.. laugh and move on.. be others and be me at the same time.. books reconstruct me..with no mercy sometimes, i get lost and forget who i am.. but this beautiful, humble, and kind love.. so simple.. your arms keep me come home.. your smile assures me that it is okay to be different.

don't blame on nature nature is just a pure reflection of us..

drinking our coffee brulee latte.. and listen to you.. make me realize again and again.. how precious you are.. you see my "wings" and not make joke on them..

you may think i am a very serious person..a mature one nope.. i am so childish.. time is wasted..as my mind loves wandering.. believe in miracles..and trust to my wishes being me is amazing.. because i don't listen to people.. i listen to love...

i couldn't think, feel like my brain and body are vaporized into this pureness.. what i see is beyond what i could describe.. in a place and time where word has no meaning.. how could i tell you.. that is what i see only love.. vast and unlimited..

humanity is about relating and feel others feeling.. with no repulse contradictions is acknowledge but could not be kept.. learning not to attach to my egoistic love.. see others souls vibrate with mine.. nothing and everything.. and words have no meaning...

forgive me.. sometimes i couldn't resist, out of my control.. i see you with my fears.. what had happened, grabbed me so tight.. i am blinded by my thoughts.. but whenever it happens.. i dont run away.. i am brave enough to stay and asking you to hold me tight...

“Our parents, our children, our spouses, and our friends will continue to press every button we have, until we realize what it is that we don't want to know about ourselves, yet. They will point us to our freedom every time.” ― Byron Katie , Loving What Is: Four Questions That Can Change Your Life

i may not be with you.. but i do, really love you.. because my heart beats with yours.. and my past kisses your past.. they talk about our love, unquestioned love...

i saw my mother this morning.. in second.. felt like universe is in me.. nothing was left behind.. love is beyond my imagination..

and you are not the same person anymore.. we have added love and emotions.. these simple and silly celebrations we have.. our coffee and breakfasts.. our hugs and warm embraces.. you and i, we are never be the same...

sky has more red than yellow mixing with grey and orange hues.. breeze and windy feels on my face and leaves... my eyes are spoiled by this beauty.. waiting in vain for another day to come.. the pace and my rhythms.. morning is never be the same.. or i am never be the same..

"evil me" say many times i am not worth enough..for getting what i want... be what i loved.. asking myself to be brave.. step out and facing the truth.. i am precious..

for so long.. i was so naive and let others define me.. heard myself sighed and screamed.. but i said to myself to be patient, keep moving till exhausted, but always, at the end of the day..i couldnt touch my soul.. i kept asking why..i did my best to walk with others on the same path.. now, sipping my coffee..i admit that i was totally wrong.. why not ask myself to define herself..? listen to my heart cause she knows better maybe i would walk alone.. some times others neglect me but love is not to be chased.. i am sure..at the end of my day.. i could say that love defines me.. so i could love you in thousands ways..

i am floating... and seeing me from different place, which is far enough to be reached my soul and yours.. they dont have name.. but they are humble enough so love could stay with us...

for years..some asked me not reveal my beauty.. being beautiful could be associated with weakness and evil.. a great sin of humanity, prevent me to be nearer to God.. they said you couldn't touch heaven by taste or show the beauty of life.. i obeyed till i saw.. knowledge is blind.. we put eyes on it and mostly our eyes..not eyes of truth.. beauty is not stolen from angels.. but inherent in me no need to struggle to be authentic me.. so i know exactly that i could find my heaven here...

you said; you know me better than myself.. maybe yes, this is sincerely truth.. you and i, we are mirroring.. the beauty lies there..

the emotions and feelings are there.. swirling faster and mixing into mine.. nights and days..all the memories are racing into my head i close my eyes.. how could i feel this much..and my life keeps flowing stubbornly.. say nothing.. i am only human, sigh to myself.. this too complicated sweet.. eagerly, they all consume my attention.. looking into your face and your dreams.. i give up..and love you completely

could i put my head on your shoulder..? admit that jealousy is with me..holding me tight hate the past of us when we're far apart.. we smile.. and sipping the bitter sweetness of our coffee late... “Let yourself be drawn by the stronger pull of that which you truly love.” ― Rumi

okay there is no "what if" again for me.. get bored with it because "what if" making me unrealistic chasing nothing from time to time.. forget that my wishes are sitting with me, tapping my shoulders..

am i weird? maybe yes, because i insist myself never take life for granted pushing my soul to break the limits so life could be unfolded.. opening more secrets not to be shared but to be kept.. and love is a gamut of secrets..

drinking my coffee, contemplating, and seeing life as it is.. might be true that love has no reasons.. cause mostly reasons are kept so we could stay in our comfort zone. create barriers and boundaries, and trust nothing.. believe in our logic reasons and listen to fears.. i confess to you that i trust braveness, experience driven..to love and be loved